Aren’t you all shocked to see me Even I am shocked. Actually they had invited me as a start guest.

Now they have disappeared.

Do you know where they are On this side? Okay, do you play music even in Kapil’s absence, But you guide the way nicely.

Thank you Yes here it is.

Is this the way? Yes, Hello? Mister, Hey, Mr Nawaz! Well, I’m, looking for you here, Hi Nawaz And you are busy on the phone here I mean Well, this is reverse dialogue.

You are searching for me there and I am waiting for you here.

This is the dialogue Whatever it is.

I am not saying it As a guest.

I’ve a responsibility.

Give me respect. I am so sorry, Mr Nawaz, You guys carry on.

I’ll leave.

No, Mr Nawaz, you don’t go anywhere.

If you go, how will we shoot the episode If the episode is not shot? How will I get the money, Hey Kapil edit it? I just said it.

You say what’s on your mind right, You will get me insulted, Mr Nawaz.

Do this? Okay, Please sit for few minutes.

I will do your introduction.

Then you can enter like a star Like a star In two minutes.

No, it will be a problem.

People think I’m very realistic. No, It’s, fine! Just two minutes.

You tell everything.

I say: Go quickly and sit there Go So friends.

You know that our todays guest is an amazing actor who pours life into any character with his performance.

Please welcome the very talented actor and my favorite, Mr Nawazuddin Siddiqui, A hearty welcome to you, Mr Nawaz, A big round of applause for Mr Nawaz, Mr Nawaz.

A hearty welcome.

I had asked to enter like a star, But you walked in quietly.

I was thinking the same, but, Like you see Salman entering on a bike, Yes Akshay Kumar enters hanging.

Yes, You give chariot to the actors from Mahabharat.

I was told to remove my footwear and come here. I mean you, can’t go so deep into realism.

No Dear, no, This is not right.

I don’t know that At least Give a little respect You should have given something At least a cycle.

Well, actually, we don’t give anyone anything.

Everyone brings their own chariot.

Our budget is so less that I came on.

Miss Archana’s cycle Well, anyways, a hearty welcome to you, Mr Nawaz, And in 00, that is in this entire year.

People have been at home due to corona, But Mr Nawaz has been making films after films.

I mean you are shining everywhere.

I am astonished about the fact that you always maintain yourself when I’ve met you. Do you exercise a lot or you don’t put on weight, I don’t put on weight.

Actually, Yes, I tried a lot.

I ate a lot of things.

I even ate mineral pitch Okay, but in lockdown you were our big support, All your films, even those I had already seen.

I watched them again, But how did you pass your time? I was far away from Mumbai.

Okay, I was alone.

I had chosen such a place where till a long distance people were not seen Great Okay, I spent my lockdown there Wow, I watched films too, And I saw your shows too.

Thank you, Mr Nawaz.

You are looking great Hearty welcome, Mr Nawaz.

Please take a seat, A big round of applause. For Mr Nawaz, I am such a die hard fan of Mr Nawaz that whatever he does any interview, I always watch it Either on internet or anywhere.

If I see Mr Nawaz on screen, then I surely watch it.

I was telling Mr Nawaz the films which I’ve already seen.

I feel like watching them again, But some things I got to know for the first time Like I got to know for the first time that you are a chemistry graduate.

So did you know that you would need chemistry with heroines from before I mean Like our Pandey Okay? He says he is good at chemistry, but he doesn,’t fall in love with anyone.

I said even palmistry should be good.

All his lines on the palm are erased playing the drum Drum sticks are printed on his hands, Mr Nawaz, when you had come last time for’Motichur Chakanachur’39, That was a romantic film.

His another film is releasing shortly’Bole Chudiyan 39.

He is romancing Tamanna Bhatia in it.

Okay. Last time you had said that the lion has tested blood.

Now That was right.

What I had main was that I’d do romantic films in future.

Yes, As I did a film about romance corona broke out, And even my heroine got it.

Oh, Oh God can’t tolerate poor man.’s romance Mr Nawaz.

I watched your one more film, Serious Men.

Firstly, It’s beautiful, Congratulations! I mean by talking.

I’m taking too much of Mr Nawaz’s time, because many people tell him that he is an amazing actor and – and you were amazing in this film too – He makes his son copy in this film.

Have you ever copied in school, Mr Nawaz, Like father like son, that’s the education he will give, I mean I too, did it? Okay! Yes, I mean when we would copy someone told us that Actually it used to very strict Okay, But someone told us that the teacher who will come to examine openly copy in front of him.

Why is that? Because he sleeps Okay, he sleeps in class. He sleeps in class So copy openly, So we came and were wondering when to take out the chits that we had hidden all over us.

We could take them out if he sleeps and then copy.

He did not sleep for all three hours.

The we did badly in our exam Later we asked someone that you,’d said he would sleep, He did not sleep, They said he sleeps with his eyes open.

Okay, there are some people like that, All the time he was Well.

What you are saying, the chits and all I don’t know if that system works now The kids have become intelligent, They have gadgets, But we used them a lot During history exam.

It was very difficult to remember.

We had remember chits Where they are kept.

Where they are Shahajahan is below this foot, It is a tough job.

I never did it. I took them once or twice, but did not have guts to refer them.

I was scared.

I’d right fast Teacher must be thinking he never studied what’s he writing now.

This happened to me, But were you ever caught Nawaz? I was not caught.

No, I was never caught copying.

Did you copy regularly? I copied a lot.

Is it Yes? Didn’t other complain that you were copying.

No everyone copied That’s, how it was Hi Kapil.

How are you Hi, Miss Archana, Hi, Hi, very nice Hi.

I big fan you, Mr Nawaz. You should be naughty with me today.

Don’t be decent with me.

Why, Then Nawaz will start looking Sharif? You did not enjoy the joke right.

No, I enjoyed the joke and laughed too Actually, since the lockdown was imposed.

So we had made these jokes Now because of year end.

It is time for clearance for us, So we tell them and finish it Anyway.

You have come after the lockdown, I felt very nice.

In fact, you had come before lockdown.

I liked that too.

Then too, you liked You have come today. I like it.

When did you not like? No, that never happened, We have a contract.

We have to praise after entry That’s, why you are doing it.

We have a set menu.


How is that Just like this, You came now.

I felt very nice.

No Forget the contract.

If I meet Mr Nawaz even outside later on, I will always say that it felt nice meeting him.

There is no artist like him Tell us what is the set menu? What else do you say here? Menu is set. Yes, there is a menu Like when the film people come.

We tell them that we saw the promo of their film, We liked it, Then the ones with album come.

Then we hear their songs and say we saw the promo of their song and we liked it.

Do you see it? No, I don’t see it.

They don’t see it.

We don’t see it, And I am your big fan.

You know the format of our show: A girl comes in the beginning and teases him That’s the start And then in the end, this main course comes.

Isn’t it like this Well, this Is this as per size or as per talent.

That’s a good question: How can I praise myself? I am talented.

What should I do? What can I do? Are you calling yourself main course So won’t I promote myself Kapil, I promote everyone, Not only myself, my dad, my brother, my grandpa, your Sapna will promote everyone. I will promote everyone Dad brother and grandpa.

What about uncle Hadn’t uncle promoted himself.

Just now I had heard that I was away.

I did not come voluntarily.

Didn’t come Sapna.

What are you here to do today? I wanted to talk with Mr Nawazuddin.

Yes, Sir, do you have a passport? Yes, You have Aadhar card passport PAN card.

Yes, I do, Then, give me one crore rupees.

What does this mean? Why should I? Why will he give The bank doesn’t give me a crore, rupees Kappu? I went to ask them the same.

Yes, They asked me to get the’Dakoo Ka Garments. 39, They would have said, get the documents.

Yes, whatever Your voice is quite loud today When Mr Nawazuddin is here, my sound will be high right, So your voice is high.

When Mr Nawazuddin is here What, if Mr Akshay Kumar is here When he’s here, you can’t speak.

How can I, Sir, can’t you stop Mr Akshay Kumar’s visit here.

My height is increasing.

What does that mean? What does that mean? He pulls our leg whenever he comes here Not funny.

This was a clearance joke written during lockdown.

Why talk about other things? Give me one crore rupees? Why do you need one crore, rupees Kappu? I want to chill out a bit The year.

2020 bought upon us a lot of depression, Very much, A lot of worry, But your work was going on fine.

What are you worried about It?’s. Fine Ours is an oil business over here Oil business too.

Yes, a massage parlor.

How many businesses do you have I’ll say why I ask one crore rupees: Yes, I’ll first buy a bungalow, then a car I’ll buy a horse, Buy hay And then buy milk Horses.

Don’t secrete milk.

I’ll buy milk from the milk delivery person.

Don’t go on my rhyming, Then I will show the horse and collect weekly money too Weekly money collection with a horse.

How Just like how Nawazuddin does in the movie? Okay A gun? Did you think the one that runs? Why will I talk about a horse when Mr Nawazuddin is here? Okay, Sir, I wanted to know about horses.

Why do horses kick from the back Now you’re talking about the real horse.

I won’t ask about the same thing repeatedly.

Let me ask him about a variety of things. For my knowledge, What is this Kappu? Is this? Why you’re here Sapna? No, I had something to be taken care of What I saw your film’Maanjhi, The Mountain Man 39.

Yes, In that you broke many mountains right, You please come to Nala Sopara and break my boyfriend Mukesh.

Why do you want him broken, Sir? He cheated me big time during Diwali Kappu during Diwali.

He said:’Come home.


Surprise you 39.

I went to his home, he said,’close, your eyes,’39 Hold out your ring finger 39.

I held out my finger with my eyes shut.

He put my finger into the socket.

I got electrocuted and was hurt badly Kappu. He doesn’t suit me at all.

Why don’t you talk to him about me: Sapna maintain social distancing.

What social distancing Kappu Go and see the elderly in the park.

Sir, there’s, no social distancing at all All couples hold their breath for 15 seconds, Give each other a quick kiss and then sanitize themselves fast That’s how they are Sapna.

Are you done? I’ve done many things since two years.

Actually many things are done, But sir, I have a massage parlor.

We have different types of massages.

If all the masseuses are like you, then I’ll be squeezed as soon as they lay hands on me.

No, I’ll do gently.

We have soft hands. 39, We have soft hands.

39, Sir.

You were in a movie named’Munna, Michael 39.

Yes, We have’Munna Michael 39, massage What is in it In this Pramod enters Pramod, So we apply oil all over his body On Pramod.

We massage him and send home.

Where is’Munna Michael 39? In this I gave Munna a massage yesterday right, I gave Munna a massage yesterday.

Hence it is called’Munna, Michael 39, massage Not funny.

This was a clearance joke written during lockdown.

They are the clearance jokes And then’Sacred Games.

39. There has been a series like’Sacred Games.


Yes, sir, we have a’Sacred Games,’massage What happens in this? What is this, Sir? In this 15 to 20 boys enter? I choose Gaitonde.

Among all the boys, Then we have Gaitonde from Monday to Sunday with us And then we massage Trivedi and send him.

Why did you massage Trivedi? Everyone dies only Trivedi survives Well.

We have a very good massage now Netflix massage What happens in this.

In this sir customer comes to us on the 5th of the month, We tell him to leave as there won’t be any massages, so he leaves, And then he comes back on the next day And asks for a massage.

We say no and ask him to leave.

This is how it is Why aren’t you giving massages.

Do I see Netflix or massage subscribers? I know there is nothing to laugh about this. Yes, But there is something called promotion right.

We earn money.

Yes, You watch Netflix.

Yes, How did you find the pack for 199 rupees Amazing? This means she received her check from the channel.

Okay, I will leave now.

Are you done? Yes, Many artists visit, my parlor too.

You know Mr Sharad Kelkar.

Yes, He played with me the other day and forgot his’Kelkar’here, So I played with his’Kelkar’and returned after dropping his’Kelkar 39, But he is an amazing artist, So you promoted two things at the same time, Both Netflix and Sharad Kelkar, We promote the artists who don’t visit as well.

We don’t discriminate anyone on our show.

Okay, I’ll leave Bye. Mr Nawazuddin, I see you’re very active on Twitter And all the messages you post are in English.

So do you directly write in English or think in Hindi? First There he is sitting over there? Okay, so he does it all.

Even now, if I need to think about these translate and type, then what type of a star am I Yes, Ms Archana, learn from him.

You’re hooked to Instagram See I am not a star.

When did I say I was Hey? Yes, I am an artist Recently.

Mr Nawazuddin wrote on Twitter about Valentin Teplyakov Valentino Because of this name.

I was about to cancel this question Because of Valentin Teplyakov.

I couldn’t remember the name.

He had written 39.

The man who introduced me to method acting 39, Sir, my question is: what is valentin teplyakov? It’s a name. He was a Russian theatrist, A director.

Okay, I’ve done plays and workshops with him as well.

He’s been my teacher as well.

Wow, It was he who taught me about method acting.

He introduced me to it for the first time When you were in NSD, Yes in NSD, Okay, I learnt what is characterization And so many things.

I respect him a lot, But recently he passed away when he was in Moscow.

Oh so sad, But did he use the Stanislavski method? Yes, he learnt directly from the student of Stanislavski Okay, so that method.

Yes, The method, Sir, I wanted to ask you one more thing: Anyone who aspires to be an actor who come from small towns have to first face criticism from family And then of the villagers Like, even when I was doing my plays and skits everyone would say He’ll never work, he’ll just do plays People never considered plays as a job.

So this must have happened to you too’There.

He goes to be an actor 39. So now that you’re a superstar when you go visiting, do those people meet you, I don’t meet them.

No, I have to meet them Previously.

They’d ask’what you do.

39, I’d say I act And they’d say’That’s fine.

But what is your job? 39? Yes, So those questions were hurtful Yes as to what do I say next, Yes, When you go in your cars, people, don’t ask what you do.

He looks like a big shot.

He must be doing something great.

Then they don’t ask thinking.

We don’t feel bad But Nawaz when the financial system is not strong.

The pressure will be enormous over there Like 39. How can you think of acting as a job 39, So even after facing so much opposition? How did you decide that you will become an actor? Did you have so much passion? Ms Archana? The good thing that happened to me was that no one stopped me because even they did not know They would say’Don’t do anything wrong in your life.



Do anything.

Your heart is in’That’s how it is What happens is I think the educated parents decide the career of their kids, What to do and what not to That’s nice.

Everyone in my family were farmers.

No one was educated.

Even my dad was uneducated, He was like do what you love, but nothing wrong, Because he himself did not know.

I was hearing another story about Mr Nawazuddin.

It was said on a TV show’That I took my mom for a movie’And she felt that 39. Yes, you’re there in the movie’39, but you aren’t the hero.

It was a bus scene 39.

What was that story? Mr Nawazuddin, when you took your mom to see a movie, The costumes and makeup weren’t good in movies.

I did.

They would show very realistic, footages, Yes, Isn’t it.

So when I worked in’Kick’for the first time she loved it.

Very much because of the fact that I was wearing a suit and sitting on notes A rich don, A rich don sitting on money.

Yes, So I asked: did she like the movie? She said 39.

I liked the movie’39, but I loved the scene where you were sitting on money.

39. Sir.

I heard another story that when you were struggling In Delhi and here as well, Mr Rajpal Yadav was doing a lot of work then So everyone would eat at his place.

So I just want to ask generally that was he really getting a lot of job, or did he have a restaurant too? Actually Rajpal started getting work when he got here.

Okay, Yes, So among us all the actors who were about 20 to 22 people, Okay Rajpal got the most work And no one else would get work.

Okay And the remaining were like 39.

Where can we go to have dinner? 39? 39? Let’s go to Rajpal’s place.

His serial is going good 39.

So all of us would literally stay at his house.

So who were the actors with you, Mr Nawazuddin Vijay me and many more actors? Rajpal’s kitchen would work nonstop from morning to night.

That was how it was Wow. Some actors would be chopping, onions, chopping, Garlic, Someone is chopping vegetables.

Has it ever happened that many of you went for the same audition and only one got selected.

Usually the situation was we 5 actors were in the same room and no one would say a word to the other Which audition, Which audition one is going Rivalry.

So we’d see one actor getting ready and we’d ask 39: where are you going 39? He’d say 39.

I am going out on some job 39.

The second one gets ready.


Where are you going, He’d say on some job 39.

No one is telling anyone anything.

Then we’d meet each other at the same auditions. Mr Nawaz has done initially done many small roles.

We realize it now.

Yes, I saw you in’Sarfarosh’and Mr Manoj’s,’Shool 39.

Yes, You had a small scene.

There Has.

This ever happened to you that you took your friends to a film in which you had a small role, and then you realize that scene has been chopped.

I had done 39, Hey Ram 39.

I was very excited.

Is it the one which had Mr Kamal Hassan? Yes, Its premier happened in the film city, Okay, I took 5 6 friends of mine along.

I told that that even I’ve worked in this film. So all of us attended it.

The premiere was going to begin, and Mr Kamal came to me and told me that my role has been edited.

Okay, I asked him if he can at least play it in the premiere.

I told him that it will be an embarrassment for him.

He said that the release is tomorrow and it’s the premiere today and they can’t do it, But he asked me to tell my friends about the same.

My friends asked me what I was discussing with Mr Kamal.

I started crying.

I told them that my role has been cut and it’s up to then if they still want to watch the movie, So they decided to watch the film without my role.

They did watch the film, But this happened.

What a journey So proud of you! Mr Nawaz, At times I watch these films. I watched the one in which you play a CBI Inspector in Kolkata,’Kahaani 39.

Yes, He played the role of a CBI officer with an attitude of his own.

I wonder how can even one even act before him? He just dominates everyone, Mr Nawaz: have you ever felt hesitant to act before a senior actor? You always have someone you look up to and who make you nervous.

Frankly speaking, I used to feel nervous before the non actors or before children.

I see I was doing this film named’Patang’and we had casted real children in it And I used to feel nervous before them.

I never feel nervous before the stars That’s good, But the unconventional actors.

If you make me act with him, I would become nervous Because their dialogue delivery would be different and we would not be knowing how to respond.

That would be very organic and natural Right.

That makes me feel very nervous And I have even experienced it.

I am a die hard fan of yours. I love you.

Thank you.

I have heard one more thing.

They say that Nawaz has been giving training to the new comers in his acting school.

Who are those actors whom you trained? There were many of them When I did not use to get work.

Initially I used to manage with workshops.

I gave classes to Ranveer Singh and also to Rajeev Khandelwal Is it That went long And Shatrughan’s son Luv? Yes, I’ve given classes to him too.

I used to do a lot because I did not use to have work back.

Then There was this incident.

The actor I was going to train was going to launch in films, So I gave him an exercise by taking him behind Lokhandwala. I asked him to say a particular dialogue continuously.

The dialogue was 39.

I am not an actor 39.

I asked him to repeat it.

I asked him to stop only when I ask him to So.

He is going on saying 39.

I’m not an actor 39.

He had all the emotions in the same dialogue.

I asked him to continue and said that I’d be back.

I’m talking to someone over the phone. Now I was talking to a director 39, Sir.

I’m Nawazuddin Siddique.



I’m from National School of Drama.



I want to work with you, I’m an actor’And he says 39.

I’m, not an actor 39.

So this was Later. I come to know that I was talking to the director who was launching that actor.

Oh wow Wow Such a unique story.

Mr Nawaz has this speciality.

When you are someone’s fan, you would know where he would have spontaneous.

I always praise’Badlapur 39.

He threatens someone with a lot of love.

Huma Qureshi is his girlfriend and he tells a guy not to trouble her That man is standing in the balcony and he is on the road and saying 39.

I have committed many murders.


39. I have just come out jail.

I will kill you too.

39.’Good night 39.

That was so He threatens him by being nice to him.

We respect the other person right, And I saw this movie named’Haramkhor 39.

He plays a teacher in it.

His wife is leaving the house and he sleeps on floor and says that he’d be died.

If she crosses the doorstep She does and then he is humiliated.

Oh my, Mr Nawaz, that made me laugh a lot.

I watched that scene in repeat mode. I asked him if that scene was written to which he said that it was spontaneous, And that scene was great.

Mr Nawaz people say that you’ve struggled hard, But I think the practice you’ve got in the meanwhile.

By doing those small roles, I think even that’s very important for an actor.

I think that has helped me a lot, Because I used to meet hundreds of people during those struggle days.

I even used to observe them.

Finally, when I started working more, I made characters out of those people Right.

Mr Nawaz, you said that you used to meet those people, But don’t, you think, once your work started, your world had shrunk Exactly You become less social.

What should one do then? I think it’s a painful process.

When you stop meeting common people, Your get those stock characters and emotions, Everything becomes cliched Right You just, Then you start repeating yourself.

Yes, I’m sorry to say, but that’s what happens with stars. Yes, Because they enclose themselves inside luxurious houses.

Yes, Even they know it, but they can’t help it.

They can’t even go outside.

I think that’s, the reason you just move casually.

I love leading my life that way, Because, somewhere, you get this saturation point in life when you think it is important to be with people understand their emotions, problems, insecurities complications and be a part of them Right That’s, how an actor enhances himself Right.

Mr Nawaz, you said something good.

I think you played this character in’Lunchbox 39.

What is the story behind that? I know it, But let the viewers know it.

I had a friend I used to stay with I used to love his style.

I thought I would copy his mannerism in a film. I got that opportunity in’Lunchbox 39.

I copied him completely.

I used to stay with him When the movie released after a few years.

I had shifted to some other place by then He watched the film.

He recognized He dropped me a message.


I saw Lunchbox Thank you, 39, That’s, all he’d written And then, Whenever he used to give auditions, He didn’t use to get selected because they’d ask him not to do that character.

As I’ve already done it, How did he use to convince them that it’s real character? He used to say That’s me 39.

I am not playing this character.

39. 39.

This is what I am originally’39.

He has copied me.

39, That’s his story.

Mr Nawaz said this line on mimicry in a Netflix series.


I think the actor who mimics someone’39 is the worst of all actors.


That was character.

That was true, Mimicry is a different form Right, But the biographies in which you play real characters. You did very well in’Thackeray 39, But you made a very good point there Doing a biopic of someone you have recently seen who is the most respected one And then living that character on screen is a challenge.

Yes And you actually fulfilled it well, But then you become cautious that you might end up doing mimicry.

Yes, That’s a bigger challenge Right, Mr Nawaz, there are many who do your mimicry.

There are stand up comedians on YouTube.

Actually, It’s because of a few particular characters of mine, They mimic a character of a particular film.

Obviously, How do you feel when someone mimics you It’s a? I think I feel very bad.

Frankly speaking, I think these are my weaknesses.

Why Well See when someone is doing your mimicry somewhere, you are adopting their style, which is absolutely wrong.

Okay And they mimic a particular character of yours.

They mimic only those small mannerism That is correct And all of them are students who are your fans But Nawaz. As a true artist, you said that people being able to copy you is actually your weakness as you are being restricted.

Yes, That you are being decoded Absolutely.

She will show this episode to the budding actors and lure them Why Mr Pankaj and Manoj Bajpayee were here a few days ago.

They told me this interesting story.

Mr Pankaj was working in a hotel and Mr Manoj stayed there and left his slippers.

Mr Pankaj says that he’s still kept it.

I have also heard that you were in a play with Mr Manoj.

For how long were you standing as a tree? It was close to three hour long play.

Mr Manoj was playing a bear in it.

Really Vijay Raaz and I were playing trees. It was in Delhi, I see Was Mr Manoj famous by then Mr Manoj was shooting for’Bandit Queen’back then, But he was very famous in theater world.

He used walk like a bear and scratch his body on tress played by us.

I used to feel Tickling.

I’m supposed to stand and I shouldn’t even move.

I used to get tickling, But I’m still supposed to stand still At times.

He used to do it deliberately.

Mr Nawaz.

We often hear rumors about the stars.

There are a few rumors about you.

There’s, a rumor that you were famous as’partridge’wrestler in your province. Is this true? Actually, I used to do wrestling in my childhood.

Are you serious? Yes, I was 22 years old, Okay Really, So I So my father told me to wrestle, But I was very lean.


So when I used to go for competitions, then the result would come out in a minute.

I used to get thrashed most of the times Either they would beat me or I was good with tactics.

Okay, yes, I used to slam them Or I have lost most of the bouts And your father used to send you back to the ring.

Yes, he used to tell me to wrestle.

He used to say that I am lean and weak.

Were you fond of wrestling? No, I was not I see If you had fondness, then you would have done this.

Yes, But my father insisted My father used to take me for the matches. My father was a wrestler When my parents got married.

Do you know what kind of a wrestler my father was Those wrestlers who used to fight in the soil? Yes, Now they have improvised it to the mats.

Now they have body suit Earlier they used to wear’langot,’and fight in the soil.

Yes And the wrestlers in the village had their own technique.

They did not so hardcore weight, training, Yes And they all had paunch The wrestlers of Delhi.

Yes, The wrestlers from Delhi and Mumbai Haryana.

They did not have a paunch, So my father did not have paunch And he used to tell the coach not to hit his ears And he wants to look handsome.


He was a wrestler, but he didn’t know When he went to marry.

Then everyone asked my grandpa if he is a wrestler, My father was fit and slim And there was a wrestler Bacchu wrestler. I remember the story.

My mom had told me: They told him to fight Bacchu wrestler.

My father was made to take off the headgear and he was made to wear the’Langot’Before the wedding.

Yes, Yes, during the wedding, It used to be entertainment, But the result was out in a minute Because that wrestler was very heavy Okay.

So my dad was able to impress everyone.

I asked him if he had lost What, if he lost Mom would not have let him forget it.

This was really the medium of entertainment back then Wow Very nice, Mr Nawaz.

There’s one rumor, that in olden times people used to send letters through pigeons.

You got inspired by this and tied a love letter to the kite and have sent it to the girls, Not girls, Just one girl, Just one.

There was only one Just one girl: Yes only one You used to tie it to the kite. Yes Did the kite fall at the right address? We used to do this when there was breeze Okay, I used to stick the letter to the kite and send it to the balcony, But I had to wait for a week Because the wind used to blow in the opposite direction Would she send the kite back Or not After a week the wind used to blow in the other direction, Then I used to ask for the reply.

Would she reply She used to reply? Her father had noticed it O God He saw me from a distance.

Did you get any reply from them? I had left the place by then Wow.

The invention of technology has made The romance The real romance.

Yes real romance.

I had loved the romance in’Gangs of Wasseypur’Beautiful.

He said’Should I hold hand 39.

39, No 39.

It was amazing.

It was such a great scene. It had happened to me the real life.

Yes, I have heard about it.

It was a real story.

Huma had told me that it was real.

Yes, I asked her, I told her 39.

We respect Mr Nawaz.

He is a great actor.

I told her that she killed the romantic hero in him by calling him 39, Mr Nawaz 39, before the scene.

He’s a great actor, so he managed to do it.

If it was some other actor, then he wouldn’t be able to do the scene, But it was great, Sir. There’s a rumor that parents scold kids for lying, But it was just the opposite in your family.

Your father used to lie to you.

Yes, he used to lie.

What is it that he used to tell you? Actually, we used to stay very close to Delhi, Okay, He used to visit Delhi.

Very often, I told him that he visits Delhi very often and what is the reason for his visit? He told me that he goes to the parliament.

I was like 39, you go to the parliament.

Yes, When Mr Bachchan was the newly MP Okay MP, I asked him if he used to meet Mr Bachchan or not.

He told me that he met him.


I told him that he is putting on weight’39 and he should take care of his health. 39.


What do I tell you? 39.


All this happens after entering politics, 39.

He used to tell you everything.

Yes, everything Later, I told him to take me along Okay, He said 39, let it be.

What will you do there 39? I told him that he has acquaintances in Parliament.

He meets Mr Bachchan.

He meets Mr Bachchan And he should take me along. He agreed to take me along Okay, So he took me along.

We had to change two buses.

It was a four hour journey.

Oh As we would reach close to Delhi, he would get tense.

Oh Yes, He used to get scared.

Don’t go.

That way.

Take this route 39: This is what he used to do.

He used to restrict me.

I asked him why he is so tense. Okay, He used to tell me that they are not right people.

How old were you when you visited Delhi? I would be around 15 years old.

I see I had been to Europe for the first time for the shoot.

Where had I gone? Yes, Bulgaria, Okay, I came to my father and told him That I had been to Bulgaria.

Sofia is the capital.

I told him I had been to Verna.

He told me that even he had been there, I asked him as to.

When did he go there? He told me that he has been there.

It’s a very good place.

The roads are very good. It’s very clean.

I told him to show me the passport.

He told me that it must be kept somewhere.

Then I realised that he lies a lot.

Oh So sweet that is Sir.

There’s, one rumor about you that you stand in your balcony from 5 am to 7 am, and you bless everyone by saying that you are God.

I have never said this 39.

I am the God 39.

That was all Thank you very much Just a minute Just a minute.

I am sorry. I am sorry Hello, Yes, Hello.

Yes, I am Bumper.

I am independent.

What You want to be my boyfriend.

Do you have the membership of’Netflix 39? You don’t have the membership of’Netflix’and you want to have relationship with me.

Hang up, Or else I will beat you up – That’s enough.

There’s no need to abuse me.

I have my own.

Thank you, Okay, Bye.

I’m. Sorry, sir! I am sorry.

I got a call.

How are you, Mr Nawaz, Hello? How are you Good Good Bumper? What brings you here? Oh, Perhaps you did not notice Just a minute What This is, how I came here.

What are you here for This man? I tell you: How do you live being this ignorant? I, on the other hand, keep giving information What language I got to Not your fault.

You’re ordinary.

I am a celebrity, No being a celebrity Good.

I need to be responsible, so let me inform you all, Since he insisted I have agreed to watch Netflix with him.

Why will he watch Netflix with you, Because I feel that he’s? My boyfriend, Mr Nawaz, You look into my eyes and I look into yours.

We might soon end up having two tiny web series – Tiny, Mr Nawaz, Which film do we watch together.

We, I think we must watch Raat Akeli hai Bumper. Will you grab my hand? No? Will you get cozy, I swear? No, Will you initiate a hug if I happen to get scared, No way, No Go watch with an elder Elder.

Why should I watch Since things are a bit romantic say those three magical words Which words Great amazing, long live Your lines Right.

He will say that he won’t rest until he breaks your bones.

Mr Nawaz, you can hear this man insult me continuously and you’re not saying a word.

Well, When will your blood boil Bumper? This is no Gangs of Wasseypur.

This is In Gangs of Wasseypur.

Someone moved Sardar Khan out of the way Here.

Someone has replaced a Sardar too.

You understood right Bumper.

Let me interview him, Like you,’ll get him a job in the railways. What, as such, is going to happen, They will remain actors.

After all, He’ll just brush death aside and come back, Sir.

I am a big fan.

I have watched all your films, I have a gift for you, Look Look So many sweaters Who gifts these many sweaters For everyone, be it dad grandpa or brother.

If you still feel cold after wearing the sweater, I’ll be your blanket.

Why blanket People can breakup with girlfriends but not quilts during winter? Yes, a quilt filled with air and no cotton.

Kapil Sharma do remember this.

What That my air makes a show fly Great, Look at this.

What is that I cooked some’Hajar ke Galwa’Hajar, It’s,’Gajar ka Halwa.

39. Sorry Never eat it.

I’ll tell you how she makes it.

She doesn’t chop them, but lies on them Then makes the mash for’Halwa 39.

The cap, You will lose your neck one day, Hey human, you will lose your life to such insignificant comical banters Bring out the child in you.

Why can’t you be sensible for a change? I forgot, you can’t like’Gajar ka Halwa 39.

You, like’Paratha 39, That too the ones from Amritsar That too, from a Minister’s house.

He had the’Paratha 39, but someone else is repenting Bumper get going.

Shall I Yes, Okay, then Archana do hold me back.

Why, Then, I might not be able to hold you back.

Okay, How can someone hold Archana Puran Singh back? She has been reigning over the industry for the last 35 years. How can we hold her back, Sir? I shall be waiting backstage Don’t.

Take this beauty spot away or I won’t recognize.

You Kapil, take a good look.

What What I am leaving Don’t ask how Bye Thank you Bye, A huge applause for Nawaz.

Please come! Thank you so much It’s, always fun.

When you come to our show All the tales that you told humorously The next generation struggling actors will learn a lot from you.

Thank you so much for coming.

Thank you.

Please come A huge round of applause for him.

This way, When there’s a group of drinkers drinking, There won’t be any arrangement of music there, But after a few pegs down, one among them become a’ghazal,’singer. Even those listening to that drunkard singing would appreciate him.

Well, Even if the other person’s singing, is hopeless, Wow, Superb Amazing Go for it again, Because you don’t see bad in anyone after two pegs, You start liking.

Everything Mr Parmeet told me this other day.

He says that Ms Archana, He says that he takes two pegs before you go home.

I see I don’t know why he said this.

You see these women in wedding.

They would always show attitude:’Sister in law come 39.

Even the father in law gets shocked.

Now 39.

She isn’t my daughter in law, 39. 39: Hey! Is she yours,’in classical music concerts? Suppose they invite ministers as chief guests, The minister does not have time to waste and someone is singing classical song there And the minister is wondering what to do.

He would be waiting to be called on stage And they leave soon after lighting it up The’shehnai’person would have no idea what to do.

He would be waiting to get a favor from the minister, But if there’s a performer like Shakira,’Hips, don’t lie’Wow, Even the one who does not know English would be jumping and dancing, And once their video goes viral they would Be giving different justification to public 39.




Music has its own greatness, 39.


It makes anyone tap their foot’And they give other justification to wives, And then she breaks their hips.

They won.’t lie for the rest of their lives. Ms Archana, have you seen a’Tanpura’player? They play it in a relaxed manner.

They would be resting their instrument on their shoulders By the time they complete a note.

They take a power nap.

Even the audience won’t realize it, as they would be asleep That’s the magic of music When they start playing.

You must have seen how these rock singers would have tattoos all over their bodies.

If you see them, you’d feel their body is covered, even if they aren’t wearing anything Ankit the tabla player He went to make a tattoo.

He asks them to make an octopus on his chest and they ask him to have a strong chest.

First, All they can make is a leech on it.

We have such people.

Those who are passionate about body building would make tattoos or dragons on their bodies, But when their body becomes weak that tattoo slowly moves towards his underarms, The python would have no option but to cover his nose with its tail. Even those in countryside wear suits these days, Even those in corporate world wear it.

Musicians back then used to wear plain clothes.

They used to only focus on playing music, But these days you find all of them in suits Gopal the keyboard player.

He went to his village after buying his new suit, And then he thrashed his cousin saying that he has become rich Seriously.

He made his grandpa, give him the old villa.

Why’Grandpa? Shall we demolish it and build a new mansion 39.

The fact that he was wearing a suit convinced his grandpa, He got the papers signed, broke the building, sold the bricks and enjoyed the money himself.

Don’t trust Ankit at all.

He is very cunning.

He was playing one 39, tabla 39, with one hand Why I asked if it’s a new instrument to which he says that his grandpa used to play’tabla 39. It seems the’tabla’was partitioned and he got the small one And then he says even his uncle has two sons And that they got the hammer and the powder box.

We had this program called’Geetmala’by Ameen Sayani People used to hear it so well.

39, Ladies and gentlemen, we will now have’39.

The listeners’choice program.’People were very passionate about songs, then Their two month old baby would be rolling in mud, but they would still be sitting with radio on their lap.

The baby would be roaming in underwear while their radios are covered with leather covers.

The radio would not even be feeling cold.

The lead actors in Indian movies need songs to get romantic, But that is not the case.

With Hollywood In the middle of a firing scene, their spirituality would arise and they start giving oxygen to each other.

I don’t know There’s firing all around 39.

Hey, I’ve fallen in love with you That’s, what they do, Our classic movies had these scenes. The heroine would reach the villain’s den without any navigation.

She would not save the hero first, She entertains the goons and their boss.


Thank you Good night, .

As found on YouTube

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